Thursday, April 28, 2011

Men and Farting 101.

So, I have been reading over at Emma's blog that she cannot fart in front of her husband, after several years of being together. I can fart in front of mine, but I can understand why she'd find it difficult.

Mr. M is a farter.
I know we are all farters, but he is a 'loud and proud' farter. He farts on me, the kids, animals, in cars, in the supermarket, into the phone when he answers it, he just farts for his own amusement. Unfortunately, he is not a rare breed. I know many men who are much like my husband so I decided, as promised to Emma, to blog my findings on 'why men fart on things and think it's funny!'

I decided to ask the only person who would give me an answer that makes little, or no, sense but is honest. My husband. Here is the conversation we had this morning:

Me: 'I'm doing research for my blog and I need to ask you something that will be an answer for the entire male species, are you up for the challenge?'

Mr. M: 'What do you want to know?'

Me: 'Why do you fart on things and find it so hilarious?'

Mr. M: 'Well... When I farted on you, I was showing my dominance. We men are superior to women and we mark our territory and lay claim to them by farting on them!'

Me: 'I am blogging about this, you know? So you are saying instead of urinating on me like an animal, you fart on me to claim me as your own? Marriage and two kids wasn't enough to bind me to you for life?'

Mr. M: 'Don't question the actions of my anus. I am a man, men fart. It's funny because you women are so disgusted by it!'

So there you have it.
Spoken by a true chauvinist.
All I got from our conversation was that he could have been saying 'Me, Tarzan, You, Jane' and it would have made more sense.

Why do men fart and find it hilarious?
Because they are pigs.
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  1. Dont question the actions of my anus... hilarious... Good work tara! :)

  2. Oh gosh Tara is it bad that I giggled the whole way thru reading this hahaha

  3. Hahaha...good one. All the men in my family are farters, young and old alike...and they all think it is the peak of humour. I think it is just part of being a man!!!

  4. I tried to contribute to your research just now by asking my son why boys find farting so funny, but he's suddenly claiming it's not funny. Traitor. I don't believe him. Six year olds are lousy for research...

  5. LMFFAO! (The second F stands for farting)
    MapGuy has 'taught' Tricky that farting is hilarious - at 10 months old he hears a fart and giggles.