Thursday, June 30, 2011

Why I cannot post excellence.

It has been approximately 22 days since my last post. Have you missed me? Don't answer that.

This is just a quick update as to why I have not shared anything of late. To those of you who have twitter and blog posts in which I have commented on, know I'm not, nor have I been, dead.

For those of you without the luxury and are curious as to why I have vanished, I apologize.

We have been ill. Myself, the Kidlets. It's been a massive cycle of phlegm and snot here. When one gets better the others get ill. Not pretty. On the upside, I sound like Tracy Bartram... Or a transvestite. Whichever.

On top of being ill, my laptop decided to die of old age. Or something that would make it hate me enough to stop working.

My only source of online-ness is my iPhone.
It proved successful in keeping me in the loop last time. This time? I haven't had the energy, or awesomeness to update.

Hubby's working different hours now.
Just me, flying solo with the kid's most days.
Since my last post, my pregnant teenage sister has joined the Happy Household. Long story that doesn't belong here. I matter here. This is my space, for me. A space where I used to enjoy escaping before total brain and body exhaustion set in.

That's a big factor in why I haven't posted.
The exhaustion.
Don't do much to be exhausted by, honestly, but I just feel like everyday is a massive struggle to get through unscathed. Everyday seems longer than the one before, and I am just chugging along like my car which seems to only ever have enough fuel to get to a service station.
Finding it hard to find joy in anything, of late, too.
Giving all I've got to my kids and even then it's nowhere near enough.

They deserve better from me.
I've given them better.

Feeling alone a lot, despite having a busy life that I am unable to keep up with and The Black Dog for a companion. Hubby's off work for a few days after having his wisdom tooth removed, and my sister is at work, hence my free moment to share my disappearance.

Not feeling fantastic enough to share in this beautiful online community I've been welcomed into and silently slipped away from. Yet, feeling like I owe you some explanation as to why I'm slipping away.

Hoping, I still hope despite feeling that hope is useless, that I can bounce back from this.
Crawl out of this dark hole I have fallen into.
Now, my babies and I are on the mend back to physical well-being, I'm trying to find more time to sleep, and get back to mental well-being.

I'll get there.
I think...


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3 comments:

  1. Oh, I was wondering where you had got to.

    I hope things start looking up for you soon, lovely.

    Don't worry about us, we'll be here whenever you come back.

    Take care xx

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  2. I have been missing your blogs :-( lucky I have facebook lol

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  3. Don't think it, know it.

    We can all bounce, but sometimes we have to be kinder to ourselves. Sleep,is more important to your health than blogging.

    That is the beauty of blogs and readers, we don't freak out when your not here, we just smile whenever you make it back.yur blog isn't going anywhere while you look after yourself, your kids and your family (that is a lot of looking after, note I put yourself first).

    PS
    Piss off Black dog.

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