It's been a long time between letters, and I don't even remember where we were at the last time I wrote to you. What can I say? A lot has changed, let's just start with that.
You inspired this post because today you learned how to say "Dinosaur" & "T-Rex".
You are pretty clever, always have been and it's the new things you are picking up so easily now, when you struggled before, that makes me realise, just how lucky I am to have you.
It was your Aunty Beanie's birthday last week, and in her birthday card you drew a picture of her. She had a head, some curly legs and arms, and a tuft of curly hair on her head. I couldn't have been prouder than that moment, when I was watching you, pen grasped correctly in your hand, and concentration in your eyes.
We've come so far since you were that 7 pound babe placed in my awkward arms on that Christmas Morning. You're 4 years old in 100 days, and the constant reminders from everyone makes me a little sad and frightened. The past almost 4 years have flown and I barely remember the feel of your itty bitty hand wrapped around my finger as a newborn. I feel like one day I am going to wake up & you'll be a man, and I won't remember these days as vividly as I do now.
You turned two this year. You are now Miss "AttiTWOed". You have such beautiful big blue eyes, gorgeous golden curls and some sharp shooting spunk! I'm hoping one day you'll read this, because I just want to thank you. Thank you for being clever, beautiful, funny and a little bit crazy. For spicing up our boring life with funny conversations & an infectious giggle. Thank you for, at 2 years old, saying all the things your brother can't and brightening up our days. Your wrap-your-arms-so-tight-around-my-neck-cuddles are one of the reasons I get out of bed. That and your demand for "Pops!" for breakfast. You are the one who has me tearing at my hair, one minute, then laughing incessantly, the next. You make me feel loved and lovely, when you look at me when I'm looking & feeling like death warmed up and say to me, with such sincerity, "you a Pretty Mummy!"
My littlest. My last. My nighttime demander of attention. What can I say?
You're my last babe & as much as I try to enjoy every cuddle, every feed, every nappy change & every bath, you seem to be growing the fastest.
There was some concern, at first, about your lack of weight gain, but you weren't losing any, so I wasn't worried. It was fate's way of keeping you little for me, that tiny bit longer. Then you gained weight & didn't stop. Each day, you're growing, ever smiling, and laughing. Trying to roll & have been (with some fluke success) since you were two weeks old. Your soft little hands, while still so small, are bigger than the wrinkly little ones that I vividly remember holding everytime you fed.
There's still so much I need to tell you all.
So much you need to know.
But I'm going to try keep you as you are.
In my memory & heart.
Lots of love & cuddles,